I’ve just had the most incredible realization.
I’ve ‘known’ this for quite a while, but I actually FELT it in my body just now. I did a ceremonial dose of pure raw Guatemalan cacao earlier because I felt quite stuck and I was feeling a lot of pain as I saw a pattern which I have been repeating in my life.
I realised that I’ve been in a ‘powerless’ position around two very important areas of my life; where I live, which is linked with getting a relevant Visa and my love life! I even started to entwine the two to create intense drama, pain, chaos and confusion! I was well aware that there was a thread of ‘powerlessness’ going on in my life, but I wasn’t really aware of the roots and depth of it.
When you believe you’re powerless, you assign the power outside of yourself. This is something I teach and I’m well aware of. Being aware of our beliefs is so important because they really do create our reality; but hey, I’m not perfect and I spent some time swimming around in the mire of one of my beliefs. Other beliefs include being unworthy, not good enough, trust, and so on and so on.
Anyway, I’m really enjoying being in the flow of life, following my spirit and allowing my path to unfold in front of me, while focusing on what I would love to create.
What I realized though, was that underneath this was a simmering anger and not having what I love NOW and having to worry myself with what I perceived as left brain, old world paradigm nonsense like Visas!
What’s so interesting is that due to Visa requirements I travelled to Guatemala a few months ago and created probably the most wonderful magic ever and added something worth its weight in gold to my Shaman’s toolbag – i.e. the use of Cacao. Since then my work and life purpose has taken on such a power and a life of its own. I’ve been using Cacao in private sessions, but much more exciting I’ve been holding Cacao Ceremonies & creating a space for others to connect with the higher realms, raising consciousness, bringing more light and love into our life and releasing pain and old hurts. So, what’s interesting is that even the nonsense rules on this planet and the old world paradigm led me to discovering more of my treasure!
Anyway, with the realization of how much of a powerless position I’ve put myself in, while believing ‘everything will work out okay’ I was putting the power OUTSIDE of me which of course puts pressure on others and puts me OUT of my power.
Now, with that realization I’m back in my power and I’ve decided on where my path is leading me. Of course, I still believe ‘if you want to make God/Goddess laugh, tell them your plans’ but the fact that I’ve taken my power back and I’m choosing which path to take is such a powerful, real, sexy place to be!
Thank you, thank you, thank you to my spirit and The Spirit of Cacao for allowing that magic to unfold!